Kaiba Episode 1 - The Broken Bonds

Well Im going to make a fanfic about Kaiba from Yugioh, and all. Rate from 1-10 and comments.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Kaiba
Episode 1
The Broken Bonds
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
As the blood shattered and fell on my face... everything changed.
Mokuba was lying on the ground as the theif got away.
I wanted to get revenge, but my body wouldnt move...
I was Seto Kaiba.
The son of a rich family, but everything is gone.
My parents...are gone.
Some of my riches were gone.
And finally...
My Soul that once was alive... is now... gone.

I ran and sat net to Mokuba.
He was my only hope.
My little brother... was all I have left.

I thought... I WILL get revenge.
I WILL kill him.
Even with my dying breath.
He hurt my little brother, so he must pay.
He will pay the Ultimate Price.
He WILL die.
For messing with Seto Kaiba... your life is over.

Wow. Thats pretty good, Aj! I think you can be one of the greatest writers of all time.

I doubte i bet he stoled it from a history from sites trust me i know hieii. lol *Runs for his life*

Pssh. Ima delete yo ass Yu Gi Oh.
Btw, Im Aj not Justin, lol, I bet u dont know me too well.